Be Your Own D@#% Valentine: A How To Guide on Self-love

Written by Lauren Schenker

Cover photo by Lauren Schenker

It’s easy to think that being single on Valentine’s Day sucks. If you’re like most people, Valentine’s Day can bring out sadness, annoyance or anxiety. From the cheesy posts on social media, the bouquets of flowers on every street corner and the chocolates in grocery stores, February 14th can be overwhelming for many.

Society has made us believe that Valentine’s Day is meant for couples. But why can’t you celebrate it with yourself? After all, Valentine’s Day is meant to be a day celebrating love – and love can come in many forms.

So, how do you find self-love?

When I think of true love, I think of the words that fill the pages of romance novels. On my journey to self-love, it took me a while to realize that my romance novel wasn’t entirely like the rest. I was learning how to fall in love with myself. I was putting energy into myself, into improving my self worth, into growing. Why are the famous romance novels never about journeys to self-love?

I think I know part of the answer. Being selfish is considered bad. When in reality, selfishness shouldn’t be a sin. It shouldn’t be frowned upon. Being selfish when it comes to your physical and mental well-being should be a priority in your life. Not only is being selfish necessary, but it’s a privilege; so, when you have the time to be selfish, take it. Be selfish when deciding when to act on your selfishness.

Here are three fun ways to celebrate yourself on Valentine’s Day- regardless of your relationship status.

Source: Shea Hendrick (with permission)

No. 1

Create your own floral arrangement! Research shows that fresh cut flowers can have a long term impact on uplifting your mood. Although receiving a dozen roses on Valentine’s Day can be lovely, picking out your own bouquet of flowers that speak to your personality is just as rewarding.

Source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/amarraaa/5936582593/

No. 2

Write yourself or someone you admire a love letter. I know what you may be thinking: we aren’t in the days of Shakespeare. However, handwritten letters are one of the greatest forms of therapy. Whether it be a letter filled with love, regret, or both, getting your thoughts out on paper is good for the soul. You can be bold and send them or as an ode to All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, set them aside and hope no one ever finds them – but we all know how that one turned out for Lara Jean.

Source: Shea Hendricks (with permission)

No. 3

Buy some lingerie! Yeah, you heard that right, wear that shit for yourself.

Lingerie was created to inspire self-confidence and make people feel special. Having a bad day? I guarantee if you put on a beautiful, lacey matching set and dance around your room, your mood will improve. Doing a deep dive into the world of intimates can be intimidating at first, but you will be happy that you did. From Savage X Fenty to Victoria’s Secret, there are many different retail options. A personal favorite of mine is the For Love And Lemons collection with Victoria’s Secret.